It's Life with Christina┃ Motherhood + Mental Health

The True INFJ

Curious what the mysterious INFJ personality is all about? Well you are in luck! I’m about to let you in…

Not sure what your personality type is? You can find out here. I highly encourage you to find out.

Now I’m an INFJ and I’m not gonna lie- it’s hard, and sometimes exhausting. Who am I kidding? It’s exhausting most of the time. But it’s also kind of awesome.

We are the rarest personality type which means we are very unique! We are also impossible to understand at times.

Being an INFJ- we are our worst critics. We dwell, we think.. we get stuck on the details. We need constant reassurance.

We are always concerned about what’s best for everyone else around us that we often forget to take care of ourselves. We want everyone to be happy and taken care of.

We often feel like we are givers in a world of takers.

We are highly emotional and logical.

We are not phone people, we just aren’t. So text us.

We are always listening.

We worry WAY too much what people think of us, we can’t help it. But at the same time we just don’t care. We are confused.

We are people pleasers through and through.

We take our energy from those around us. This means if someone is sad, we feel it deeply. Their anger, we feel that too. If someone is doing great things and highly motivated, we can take that energy and run with it.

We are social chameleons– we shift everything to fit into whatever group we need.

We can be extroverted when needed but it’s exhausting.

We need projects, goals and a purpose.

There is no “real version” of an INFJ because we are always changing. Probably why we don’t understand ourselves.

Depression is common with INFJ’s because we are so rare that we feel alone and feel like no one understands us most of the time, add in that we are highly introverted- it’s recipe for disaster at times.

We like control. We need it. Routines, to-do lists are our jam.

We are obsessive.

We want to know what’s coming up, we are future planners. Last minute things are not how we roll.

We are perfectionists- in our work, in ourselves, with our homes.. everything. We set impossibly high standards that we can never meet.

We sometimes overshare to make others around us comfortable.

We are awkward. We don’t know how to act in certain situations and then we get in our heads and it’s a mess.

We have ALL THE IDEAS. They are big. People usually think we are bonkers.

We are true introverts. But we tend not to be shy around the people we trust. But new people? This makes us incredibly uncomfortable.

We like a small circle. We take a lot of care picking the relationships in our life. We feel out of place in a big group of people. It depletes our energy and it’s also hard for us to be our true selves.

We are easily drained by social activities. Even those simple get togethers. Having to be engaged for long period of times is often too much and takes us awhile to recover.

We need strong bonds in our relationships and we are fiercely loyal.

We are extremely rational.

Our intuition is usually spot on, we are great at not only reading people but predicting what they will do next.

We are EXTREMELY EMPATHETIC. And that sometimes is too much.

We absorb other people’s emotions. Other personality types don’t understand this because it’s so out there.. but it’s true. WE feel it all.

We feel different, like outsiders. Always. This never goes away. Even to our family and our close friends. We feel like we don’t fit in anywhere.

We often wish people got us and we question everyones intentions around us.

We love being the one who everyone comes to. We are great at giving advice because of our ability to be rational and see all sides but it takes a toll on us because we feel so deeply.

We can not handle conflict. Period. We will avoid it at all costs. We can’t handle it in our lives and we also can’t be witness to it. It makes us physically ill and causes anxiety. We need harmony and we do our best to make sure everything is handled so it doesn’t lead to conflict.

It means we are incredibly sensitive.

We put constant pressure on ourselves to be perfect.

We are always reinventing ourselves.

We’ll dwell on the tiniest thing for days. The way you texted us, the thing you said.. it won’t mean anything to you but it means everything to us. Even if it’s nothing.

We love to analyze and research. We love to set goals. We love self-development and growth.

We are not comfortable with change. We don’t like new environments.

We often get stuck in our “inner world” inside our head.

We are dream chasers, incredibly kind and thoughtful people but private and reserved with our feelings.

We often wonder if people truly care about us and when they are going to leave.

We feel judged all the time. We are highly sensitive to criticism.

We are always wondering what the ideal “everything is”. What the meaning behind everything is.

We are swayed by how we feel in the moment. We have a sensitive, old-soul.

We will “shut the door” on those who have wronged us- whether it’s right or wrong.

We are hardwired to think about people- how they think, how they feel, what’s going on with them. We want to know everything.

We love to help people reach their full potential and we will be their biggest cheerleader.

We don’t know how to brush people off. This isn’t a thing to us.

We want to fix all the things and we want to fix them now.

We get sensory overload easily- loud noises, bright lights, too much going on, too many details.

We attempt to control everything around us.

We have to have organization in our environment, clutter is instantly overwhelming to us.

We are excellent writers, musicians and poets- language comes natural to us and we love it.

We like beautiful things- songs, art, our home. It’s calming to us.

We fear insanity because we are often so consumed by our thoughts in our own heads that we wonder if we are crazy.

So there you have it.. life inside the head of an INFJ personalty. Thanks for reading!

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